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Find your values and strengths to mold your leadership style

There’s this woo-ish parenting guru that I sort of follow (he writes loooong posts, I skim, no patience.) He’s dislikes parenting that’s based on power differences between children and adults, and encourages parenting by leadership. For people who loathe boundaries and rule-setting (me!) his approach is very comforting. Unfortunately, I’m far better at not having rules, than at being a true leader at home…

Leading is easier for me in work environments, where the power relationships are explicitely understood by everyone. (Also, where I don’t need to enforce bedtime, #fail!) While I love the flexibility of being self-employed, this is an aspect of corporate that I miss.

Since my children make subpar employees, I don’t have much inspiring advice based on my current leadership initiatives (e.g. “Clean up your room!” or “Go to bed already!”) This is why I enjoyed an article by Leah Tomlin and two super useful tools she shared with me. Leah is an award-winning business owner and certified Executive Coach, named in the Brainz 500 Global list for top business leaders and entrepreneurs of 2021. (Mel Robbins and Oprah are on that list!)

 

Two great assessment tools for leaders

In the article, Leah recommends the VIA Character Strength Survey, to find your strengths and values. Personally, I was impressed by how accurate it was. You’ll get a full list of your strengths, and then you can add a small fee for an explanation for how to make the most out of them.

These are my top strengths/values. Humor is definitely one that I lead with as a parent, because when you don’t like yelling, laughter is a great way to diffuse tension and encourage collaboration.

From a professional perspective, I was very pleased with #1, which is feedback that I often get from my clients. Together with #6, Creativity, I am able to simplify complex issues and offer a fresh point of view that helps in problem solving and implementing change. Sadly, it will take another 20 years or so for my kids to believe I have any qualities that fall under “Wisdom”… 😀

After you map out your strengths, use Leah’s Level Up Your Leadership tool. It allows leaders to assess their leadership and get personalised, actionable and evidence-based feedback on their next leadership steps. This one is completely free.

 

Transform your leadership

To take action on these insights, read Leah’s 10 Tips on How Start Your Life and Leadership Transformation. My favorite is #4, stepping out of your comfort zone.

My own tip is useful both for grand leaps and also for random tasks you are avoiding because they feel uncomfortable: Almost any project begins with something small and bureaucratic, like finding the phone number for a call you’re dreading. Do the small thing. It can create enough movement and energy to continue, and before you know it, you’re outside of your comfort zone, still alive…

For a fun little experiment in stepping out of my comfort zone immediately, I decided to tackle my nemesis, the bedtime. My non-threatening, simple first step was to take a look at the clock to find out what time it was. Panic! 10:50 pm!!! Yes, it’s summer break, but still… Gotta get those kids in bed. Wish me luck!

What strength do you lead with? Which of the 10 tips is your favorite?

 

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